You know those mornings when nothing goes right? You spill coffee on your shirt, miss your exit, forget the one thing you swore you’d remember? Welcome to my reality. I’ve never been great with directions (ask anyone who’s been in a car with me), and I tend to show up to places like a small tornado. I constantly forget to lock my car, misplace my keys, and usually am scrambling out the door because I grabbed the wrong bag or left my phone on the kitchen counter once again. It’s not chaos on purpose, it’s just how my brain works. It’s half in the moment, half three steps ahead and maybe a tiny part thinking about my next snack.
But here’s the thing I’ve come to believe. All those little slip-ups, delays, and unexpected detours? They aren’t just chaos. And while it used to frustrate me, I’ve started to embrace the small tornadoes as course corrections. Maybe it’s the unexpected turns that give our story its depth and its meaning. And one day, you’ll share this story, and it will be the reason someone else doesn’t give up.
That’s the concept of the Burnt Toast Theory. The idea that when something doesn’t go according to plan, it might be the universe protecting you, nudging you, or steering you somewhere better. It’s not a setback, it’s a reroute in a new direction.
Think about how many times you have looked back at something that didn’t work out and thought, thank God it didn’t? The delayed flight that sparked a conversation you wouldn’t have otherwise had. That job you didn’t get, which freed you up for something more aligned. The “missed opportunity” that turned out to be a bullet dodged.
I haven’t missed a flight yet (knock on wood), but I’ve missed a lot of things I once thought were important. And strangely, some of those “missed opportunities” shaped my life. For example, I applied to become a financial advisor at a bank at the age of 20. The idea of a 9–5 desk job felt comfortable. I did not get the job, but talking about it sparked a conversation with my mother-in-law, and she offered me a mortgage specialist assistant position. Conveniently, she was my neighbour and worked from a home office. This opportunity paved the way for my whole career. I’m so so glad I dodged the 9–5 bullet.
Even if you don’t buy into the “everything happens for a reason” mindset, reframing the bad days as “what is this teaching me?” can shift everything. It moves you from frustration to curiosity. From anxious to grounded. It opens your eyes to the idea that maybe you weren’t being punished, you were being prepared. And now you can use it as motivation to become stronger, to turn pain into purpose, and to move forward with a little more wisdom than before. Because one day, the moment that felt impossible, will become part of your comeback story. A story you’ll tell as proof that even the hardest chapters have meaning when you choose to grow from them.
Three years ago, I detoured into a new chapter of my life and career with no map (I’m terrible at reading them anyway). But in all twists and turns, I found my voice. I found my purpose. I found my people. And those people became my best friends. Sometimes, life strips everything away so you can see what actually matters. It humbles you. Refines you. Reveals the superpowers you didn’t know you had. And finds the people who belong at your breakfast table, drinking coffee and enjoying peanut butter toast that isn’t burnt for once.
“I wasn’t falling apart. I was just being rebuilt, piece by piece, into the person I needed to be for the next chapter.” -Alicia Biggar
So if you’re in the thick of it right now, if things feel like they’re falling apart, remember that bad days don’t mean a bad life. Wrong turns still lead somewhere meaningful. One failed dream doesn’t mean you’re done dreaming.
“You can never break a woman who finds beauty in everything — even pain. She turns her scars into wisdom, her struggles into strength, and her setbacks into a comeback.” -Unknown
So if you burn your toast tomorrow morning, if the plan unravels, just take a breath and start again. And again. And again. Because you’re not running behind, you’re not lost. You’re right where you are supposed to be!